Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
