It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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