dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
