I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
