I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize