I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
