this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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