We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
