She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
