quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
