no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
