Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
