HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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