She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize