Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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