420 ftw
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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