Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
