The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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