Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
