I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Congratulations! We have a period
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
