i think i have herpe
just one?
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
