mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
If I die, sorry about rent.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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