Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
