Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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