i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
