'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
