Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Randomize
