Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
