I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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