I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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