The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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