Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I don't think brook has ever known best
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
ugly people sure do ruin things
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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