Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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