24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize