i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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