apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
