Walk of Shame. In a state park.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize