She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
