Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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