You were right. It hurts to walk today.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
