You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize