On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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