I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
