Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I just want nice things and good sex
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize