I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
