I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
