Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize