If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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