I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
He told me they were just razor bumps!
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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