Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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