If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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