I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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