Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I love having hate sex.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
