Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
